Picking the easy targets since 1993
RW: Every time I see Campbell (bass player for fellow Richmond band, Lamb of God) he's got the RPG flag flying.
Partin: Yeah, he's our street team leader We appointed him head of our street team.
RW: But he's doing it.
Partin: He's not doing shit . . . We suck 'cause Mark and Campbell are cool.
Matt: Yeah, we're not afraid to--anyone whose ever done us major favors--spit in their face.
RW: We're not talking about Lamb of God, we're talking about RPG.
Matt: What do you wanna know?
RW: What should I know?
Partin: Drummer sucks.
Matt: I will guarantee this, I will say one thing about RPG, man, we have more fun-and you can ask Richie—Richie's been on tour with a lots of bands for a really long time, and we have more fun than any band, anywhere, at any time. I guarantee. Ask Richie (merch guy for tour).
Marunde: We do more drugs than any band, anywhere, at any time.
RW: They say they do more drugs than any band, anywhere, at any time.
Matt: Have more fun.
RW: Oh, I'm sorry, my bad, my bad.
Richie: I do more drugs.
Marunde: But we smoke more weed than any stoner band, man, I'll tell you that.
Richie: Any band I've ever been out with, they have more fun.
Partin: But he hates our band.
Partin: He does.
RW: I can see that.
Partin: Yeah, you can?
RW: No, I don't understand that.
Partin: So what's up man, why'd you break up? (Reagan National Crash Diet)
RW: No, this isn't about us.
Partin: I want to talk about Jen and Carol.
RW: This is not about us, this is about—
Partin: Where they at?
Matt: What else you wanna know, man? Feed me.
Partin: Let's talk about Todd Uzel (Decibators).
RW: You know the RPG, I mean you guys are like—
RW: Well. Did you know there was gonna be a war with the RPG—
Partin: He (Marunde) totally called it.
RW: You're a veteran of the first Gulf War, I know that, so you called this one?
Marunde: Surely. I say a lot of shit that people disagree with.
RW: They don't even pay attention to you.
Marunde: But in time I'm always proven right.
Matt: (on the name) Was it necessarily that? I mean it was kinda-it started out as something else then it turned into—
RPG: It was Rocket Propelled Grenade, then it was DMZ. RPG? DMZ? Cool.
RW: Same thing, kinda similar.
Marunde: There was an RPG sign above our practice space that said Richmond Pussy Generators or some crazy shit like that.
RW: Richmond Pussy Generators?
Marunde: That's what the sign said.
Partin: That's what we made it say.
Marunde: Yeah, well. That's where it comes from.
Matt: It was all about football rock in the beginning. We were gonna start A.F.R.O.; American Football Rock Organization.
RW: You were going to be the vanguard of American Football Rock?
Matt: Yeah, we were gonna be all about football and rock and drinking.
RW: What football (incoherent) would you be?
RPG: NFL, man.
RW: Yeah, but what team? I'm gonna get to the Redskins, but--
RPG: The Raiders, The Packers, and the Steelers.
Todd Uzel: Redskins suck!
RW: How 'bout the Bears? Does that enter into-
Partin: Hell no!
Matt: Bears signed Cordell, man.
RW: We made some mistakes.
Richie: I'm talking about the Philadelphia Eagles, I'm talking about the Atlanta Falcons.
Marunde: If the Philadelphia Eagles are so great why can't they win a fuckin' National Championship?
Matt: We'll get into football more when football season rolls around.
Richie: Just watch, man, Philadelphia Eagles number one!
RW: What baseball team are you rootin' for?
Partin: I don't like baseball.
Matt: Richie likes the Braves.
RW: But let's suppose you had a baseball team.
Partin: It would be the Richmond . . . whatever they are, man.
Richie: Richmond's not even a real city, dude.
Matt: But we got a farm team, dude.
Richie: Richmond's not a real city.
RW: Todd would always slag off Richmond, but if you ever diss Richmond.
Matt: It's like your momma. You can talk shit on your momma, but if anybody else talks shit, it's like, what the fuck?
Todd: But Atlanta?
Matt: Naw, I'm cool with Atlanta.
Richie: I'm cool with Richmond too, man.
Todd: How could you not be cool with Richmond?
RW: In Richmond, when you go back, what are you going to do?
RW: Pussy, that's it?
Partin: That's the main objective.
Matt: Sunday night, man.
RW: You've been faithful to your wife?
Partin: Yes, sir.
RW: She'll be glad to hear that.
Partin: Well, she probably won't ever hear that, but . . .
RW: It's admirable 'cause you probably have groupies.
Partin: Groupies all over the place.
Partin: Everywhere. We'd roll with the pussy, but all of us are good guys. We like to talk to girls but I can't wait 'til Sunday. I just hope I can move by then 'cause my body is breaking down. My knees are gone, dude.
Matt: Yeah, I can barely walk.
RW: You got Cleveland and that's it, right?
Partin: That's it.
Matt: When you think about the beginning of the tour, it was so long ago.
RW: Where'd you guys start out, where was the first place you played?
Matt: Greensboro, North Carolina. Then we went to Atlanta and picked up Richie, and then made our way down south to New Orleans.
RW: Where'd you play in New Orleans?
Matt: The Dixie Tavern. Then we played at South by Southwest.
RW: You guys played in Fort Collins with Booker Noe and who else?
Matt: It was Booker Noe, the Virginia Sisters, and two stand-up comedians. Nobody got shot in front of the club so it was good.
RW: How was that? There's a weird community in Fort Collins, Colorado of like—
Matt: Ex-SoCal punks.
RW: Yeah, it's like, how the hell did they end up there?
RW: Who is the shittiest band of all time? Lets go on the record.
Matt: Whose the shittiest band of all time?
Partin: Reagan National Crash Diet.
RW: Well, that's a given, that's a given.
Partin: What's that band we played with in Fort Worth, man?
RPG: Cobra Three.
RW: Cobra Three, Shittiest Band in the United States.
Matt: No, no, no, uh, uh, A Million Pounds!
Partin: Yeah, A Million Pounds.
RW: A Million Pounds, The Worst Band in the United States.
Matt: Best band name I've seen on a sticker this tour, Total Intolerance.
RW: But they weren't the worst band?
Matt: Didn't see 'em play. Just saw the sticker. A Million Pounds is the worst fucking band.
RW: And they're from New Orleans?
Matt: No. They're from Fort Worth, Texas.
RW: All right, let the record show, RPG says A Million Pounds suck. They're callin' 'em out.
Matt: It was like a million pounds of pain.
That's it. That's what booze will do to an interview. Be sure to buy RPG's debut full-length, Full Time wherever you can find it. Go to their shows. Goodbye.
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